The sound of the slight waves from the wake of the cruising boats lapping up on the shore.  The feint light of the moon illuminating the lake from underneath the cover of clouds.  The sound of drunk teenagers singing "Hakuna Matata" on their boat, celebrating their final moments of freedom.  And I get to embrace it all.

The peace I find here awakens memories I tried so hard to suppress.  The warmth of a hand in mine as I try to fall asleep.  The thumping on the ground coming from the room next door.  The pride from receiving a compliment.  The awkward proclamation that flourishes a friendship.  Blue flags, muddy shoes, mosquitoes, white costumes, and plastic bags.  The memories I hold so dear, perhaps too dear.

Why wouldn't you want to live in the past when the past was so wonderful?  To move ahead, does that mean to lose behind?  So much uncertainty to come.  So much change to bear.  So many relationships held together by a thread of what used to be.  We're growing up now.

I try to forget so I stop holding on to what I wish it could be.  The wind is changing direction.  It's time to let go.  It's time to move on.  It doesn't mean it never happened.  It doesn't mean it can't remain in our minds.

Adonai, our God, lead the way.

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